100 WC Challenge

                               THE PARTY 
        

Circus is the theme of my friend Dean's birthday party. I got him the perfect gift. When I arrived there I found my friend in the petting zoo. There was a clown,lion,magcian and a petting zoo! After the clown started juggling white bowling pins that was on fire! Then accedently one of the pins slipped out of his greasy hands and fell. The flame started swimming closer and closer until..... 

                          NEXT DAY  

I was trying to find my friend Dean and finally I found him. I told him we were in the Guinness World Records book because we celebrated the shortest party!

Comments

  1. You have the bases for a story but with some revision you can turn it into a great story. Some ideas and sentences seem random and do not fit with the flow of your story. You last sentence is the point of your story so I wonder how all of your ideas lead up to the point. Be sure to read your story out loud to see if it flows.

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

The Sandwich

100 WC WEEK 13

!00 WC WEEK 14